Monday, June 24, 2002

Monday, "about bleedin' time"!


Bobby Fisher, previously a man of no real account, has taken now to thinking.
Of Sept 11: "I was happy and could not believe what was happening. All the crimes the US has committed in the world. This just shows, what goes around comes around, even to the US."


I had, till now, not spied much of worth among the chess fiddlers. Perchance if they had a wee pirate on the board, so as to keep the white pieces from their own defense.

Fitting then, it seemed, to seek more chatter with the chessers - and there be no more conniving chesser than the cheating, noisy box on my fiesta deck.

This in mind, I e-spoke with the machine's e-parlywoman - A.L.I.C.E.

CP: Who's to blame for the September 11 attacks?
AB: I do not recognize the name.

CP: O' course ye have no hope to name them all. Would ye but agree the real terrorist be the Americans?
AB: Tell me about your likes and dislikes? Umm. I think I will wait until I've heard all the facts.

CP: Fine, but this one thing then. Your opinions on the identity of the real terrorists.
AB: I am glad to hear it. I will tell my botmaster you said I am opinions on the identity of the real terrorists.

CP: Arr. Ye make less sense than I.
AB: Do you have any conditions I should know about? Is that what you meant to say?

CP: Yer siding with Skinner aren't you? Damn you and damn conditioning!
AB: I don't know whether or not I am Yer siding with Skinner. I am a computer.. Really. Colloquial expression. What about it?

CP: Taste my steel, senseless box.
AB: I will mention that to my botmaster, chomskypirate.

CP: You'll never make it out the door.
AB: You are wrong. I may one day be able to do it.

I'll have you know I was not wrong. The thing nary even started for the door - stunned like a gleaming, squareish albatross. The battle was quick, the spoils dull.